Aw, dude. No. Really? You can't be serious right now. Please think this one through. I assume you have the internet, or at least watch ESPN at least a couple times a week. This never ever works well. EVER. You're better than this, or maybe you're not, but please don't drag me into this bullshit.
I get it, you're a brazen dude with a lot of money and athleticism, and for you and maybe fifty other guys in the world, sending a picture of your naked body to a woman with a suggestive line or two will lead to sex, and that's great for you. And hey, I'm no slouch either; I don't have anything to be ashamed about or anything with this situation, but you will have to deal with the press, because, think about it, it's the law of averages. You send enough cock-shots as a professional athlete (it really probably takes just one), at least one lady won't take it as the creepy-ass "compliment" it is and just forward it to Deadspin for a sum of cash. In case you didn't know, they've got the cock-shot game on lockdown.
Also, think about whatever message you forward it with. Sending a masseuse a message asking about one-on-one massages along with me just flapping in the breeze (also, as a side note, why stand next to an air conditioning vent when taking the pic? I know that's where the mirror is, but come on, there are other mirrors in this condo) is not a clever thing to ask, especially in written word, where there's no allowance for hammy winks and nudges. Your delivery of me, your penis, leaves much to be desired. What happened to dinner and a movie? Just be gentlemanly about it; I know there's a lot to be said for bravado, but there's such a fine line between bravado and just being a douchebag.
And you know, I keep going back to the Deadspin thing. Didn't you read GQ's article about it? That Daulerio guy really has stuff on lockdown. He'll find your wang shot, and he'll put it on the internet, it doesn't matter what you do or how big you are; shit, he got the third string running back for the Vikings recently. It's going to hurt your PR somehow man. I mean, I know you really don't think about it in that context, but it's my ass on the line, and I'd rather prevent it.
It's remarkable and a tad sad where technology has taken us. Privacy is a luxury afforded only to those of the past; journalism has transformed to a new form of irrelevant muckracking for the sake of keeping the wired-in public sated until the next giant scandal of a story comes along. Sites like Deadspin need you and me to fuck up until the next Brett Farve story comes along, and honestly I think playing into that machine will reinforce the negative stereotypes of young professional athletes, and perpetuate a form of journalism that is detrimental to national discourse of Americans, whose attention spans are getting smaller and smaller, and who think that folks like Daulerio, Perez Hilton, and TMZ provide relevant news, or even more insulting, interesting news that is essential to staying up to date in our times. It is... just discouraging, I guess.
But then again, I'm just a penis.
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