Bowling

Something rings wrong about the Lucky Strike bowling alleys.

I think it's the fact that they have a guest list on their website.

And it's not even that the first two names on said list list are Christina Aguilera and David Arquette. That's fine, if a bit dated; it's that the list is even there.

I'll paraphrase Squeak Scolari from Baseketball here: bowling is "A game where guys with bad backs and bad knees can get together and compete on the same field as guys that are all goosed up on steroids." It's not a night club, and therefore there should be no guest lists or celebrity quality to a bowling alley. That ruins the fun of bowling alleys.

East County San Diego is a one-bowling alley type of town. San Diego county, I believe, is a four-bowling alley type of county. None of which are Lucky Strike lanes.

Rather, and I mean this as a compliment, I think most of them are shitholes. I know the Parkway Bowl in East County is, because I bowled there today. And again, I mean "shithole" as a compliment. That's what bowling alleys are supposed to be. A place where elitism isn't allowed. Salt of the earth, you know.

I enjoy bowling, but equally so I enjoy the feel of a bowling alley. The fact that most of them feel like they've been around for forever, and they were never quite funny, but the place you'd hang out with with your friends when you were anywhere other than cool and in your twenties, if that makes sense.

Lucky Strike ruins that. I bet you there's no wood paneling anywhere in a Lucky Strike lane, and the drinks are expensive.

That being said, I've enjoyed places like that. Zodo's in Santa Barbara is quite neat, even though it's a little futuristic and trendy looking. But there's a key difference: they have White Russian specials during happy hour. That means they know their audience--not so much cool trendy folk, as their aesthetic would let on to, but rather college kids who like booze and The Big Lebowski. For that, Zodo's gets a free pass on lacking wood paneling.

Also, they don't have a guest list.

And I realize that writing all of this about aesthetics and qualities of bowling alleys thereby makes me elitist and invalidates a lot of what I just wrote. But hey, it's the internet, and a blog, and pretentiousness is needed to make a point every once in a while. Plus, only about fifteen people read this, and much like me, are quite willing to give me free passes if I don't make sense every once in a while. Thanks.